Monday, July 17, 2006

Busts on Wreck Beach are Nuts?

With heroin flowing through our ports, property crime out of control, and organized crime on the rise, I for one am glad to see that our boys in blue have not taken their eyes off our balls. The VPD rated an impressive 4.5 cruisers out of 5 cruisers last weekend at Wreck Beach. (Three points for the three marked cars parked in the no parking zone at the top of the hill and another for the less than subtle unmarked car parked immediately behind the others. The remaining half point is for the two park rangers who walked the beach trailing just behind our boys in blue.)
Now, don't think that this posse of law enforcement took a stroll along the beach for their lunch break. They hadn't just been at the top of the hill safeguarding all the unattended vehicles and thought how much better a Stormin' Norman's veggie burger would be than another round of doughnuts.
Instead, it's clear that some ever vigilant high civic official has realized that Wreck Beach is such a danger to the fabric of our city that a constant and impressive police presence is required. If marijuana leads to harder drugs, imagine what naked pot smokers can get up to. I for one feel safer in my neighbourhood knowing that the VPD is cracking down on Wreck.
Harmless, Disorganized Crime you say. Pot smokers are lazy? You haven't seen what these little beavers have been up to. They have built entire neighbourhoods out of driftwood and deadheads. They have make shift restaurants. Even a library. What's worse is they have cold beer (or at least it is cold tasting). Like mad pirates they dig up buried coolers of icy beer throughout the day. Who put them there? Disorganized lazy hippies or Kingpins of Crime?
Get em' boys. This city ain't supposed to be fun.