We Have a Winner

To celebrate my birthday, a few of my friends joined Donna and I for a Lions game. We had a few drinks before the game and a few at the game. So by the time we darkened the door of the Kingshead, we were all, well, gooned. In fact, gooned enough for Donna, with just a little push from Claudio Lopez, to enter a beer drinking contest.
Four people lined up on stage - two men and two women. I don't know if it was supposed to be two different competitions. Somehow I don't think it was, but as I've implied already, I'm by no means a reliable witness. Either way, Donna was convinced that she only needed to beat the other woman. The man with the microphone may have had other ideas. None of which needed to be very clear as this contest had absolutely no prize on the line.
Now, the two men finished their respective pints with relative ease. They were neck and neck coming down to the last second, but I can't tell you which one won. I can't tell you because as the host was trying to announce a winner, Donna feeling ignored perhaps, started kicking him.
I believe she was very proud of the tremendous lead she had on the other woman. So proud she demanded recognition and not wanting to even pause in her attempt to finish the pint, all she could muster was, not one, but several kicks. He seemed puzzled. Still drinking her beer, still kicking our host, she started pointing at the other woman's virtually full beer.
Our host tried to ignore her. He tried to announce a winner. He tried to get some distance between himself and this mad woman abusing his shins. Donna would have none of it.
In the end, all he managed to say was, "But your not even finished your beer."